So. Today marks one years since I was shown to the door at my last job. Wow. In some ways, it has flown by and in others it feels like that was a whole other world. In some ways, I'm so glad it happened. In others, I'm still in shock that it did.
I can so clearly remember the heart drop when I figured out what was happening in that conference room. The drive home when I called J on my cell to tell him my news. The sunny weather outside when I sat on my deck and called my family. Going inside and writing about it on Facebook (ha!) and then going out to a pre-planned dinner with friends that night feeling like it was all just a dream.
In a lot of ways, the past year has been a gift. I've gotten to spend so much time with my daughters. Time I would otherwise not have had. I've gotten to prove to myself that even though I may not be "cut out" for staying home, I have made it work. I've found things to keep us busy and activities that stimulate the girls. I've gone on countless playdates, played at hundreds of parks, had more girls days than I ever had before. Not every moment was full of joy, but I'm glad I had every one of them.
On the other hand, I can't say that the past year has been all roses. There's been a lot of stress too. We lost an income when our lifestyle was based on two. We lost my healthcare and have medical bills for the first time ever. I have been humbled in a way I had never been before. Because life has always come fairly easily to me. At least when it comes to the big things. So to fall victim to this recession and to have it last this long - well, it has taught me that life doesn't always go as planned. Financially, we're behind where we should be and would have been. I've stayed up more than a few nights worrying about this.
But in the end, the good does outweigh the bad. If you offered me $20,000 to give back all of the time I've had with my family, of course I would say no way. (But if anyone wants to offer me $20,000, I'll take it!)
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